The Clampetts Return

We are home from Colorado. We drove all day yesterday starting at 6:15 a.m. and ending at our doorstep at 12:08 a.m. God was so good to us.

I need to confess that the whole trip was about to be booted out the door due to finances and lack of money for such a trip. I wanted to leave Saturday afternoon after Levi's football game. Dan and I crunched the figures and we decided that the trip just wasn't feasible. I took a shower and cried out to God. I told him that I know he had everything under control and if he wanted me to go to Colorado, he would have to arrange it. I also told him how much I needed to just get away for awhile after completing almost all of my cancer treatment.

I was dreading calling my family to tell that that I wasn't coming. I called and one of them said not to count the trip out yet. She wired me some money and we were on our way Saturday afternoon. I was suppose to stop somewhere along the way to sleep for the night but I was so excited that I drove all night and arrived in Colorado about 8:45 in the morning.

We had a splendid time! We went to Estes Park, the kids visited the Denver Zoo. I connected with old friends from work and old friends from high school. I ate tons of wonderful Mexican food! We spent relaxing time with family. It was just what the doctor ordered.

I am home and I feel so good. I am ready to finish up this journey. I counted up and I have only 4 or 5 Herceptin treatments left. I am almost done.

A friend shared this wonderful song and video from Martina McBride about the cancer journey. Please click here to watch. Just make sure you have a tissue handy. I have said all the things that she says in the song. I couldn't have done it without God, family, and friends. I love you all!

Will post more later. I have a car to unpack and some settlin' in to do.

Done with Radiation

Done with that. Check that one off the list.

I had 26 to my chest wall and then 7 to my scar and my lack-a-breast area. My chest wall is healing nicely from my burns but my arm pit is nasty looking and kinda oozy. It stinks too. Smells like laundry that's been left in the wash after washing for too long. I do actually take a shower once in awhile so it can't be from that. It's from the burns. You'd think it would smell like burnt skin, wouldn't you? It was funny because I would smell this smell and wonder if it was someone around me. Imagine my surprise when I discovered it was myself! :) It will go away when the new skin appears.

Other than that, life has been good. We've been a bit stressed by my driving to radiation every day. My Suburban cost $115 to fill and I had to fill once a week. It could have been worse though. Could have had to drive farther like St Cloud or Rochester. God has always provided what we've needed and He's not going to stop now.

Hoping to head to Colorado tomorrow after Levi's football game. It will be such a nice break. They unhooked the chain and I'm outa here. :)

One. More. Radiation. Tomorrow.

The Whiny Hag is Gone...

Ok, I'm done whining and feeling sorry for myself. Sometimes I'm so ashamed of myself and how easily it is to get distracted. Eyes off myself and my circumstances and back on Him. Ahhh, so much nicer! I DO have so much to be thankful for. I feel God's presence with me and my family daily. He is my ever present help in troubled times. I am so grateful for His love and care!

 We are headed over to the north shore of Superior tomorrow to camp with the kids. We haven't done anything like that all year so it will be a nice little reprieve. Praying for good weather (we tent camp) and a fun time with the kids. We plan on seeing an old lighthouse, hiking, watching the big ships come into harbor and just enjoying each other's company.

Have a wonderful weekend. Celebrate life and love and the beauty that He's placed around us each day. It's a choice and so much better than whining or complaining! :)

Trust him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge. Selah 
Psalm 62:8

Happy, happy, joy, joy

I'm two thirds done with my radiation. I've had a bit of fatigue but it is smooth sailing compared to chemo fatigue. My right breast area is very itchy and I've scratched enough to open up the skin in places. I'm using some cortizone cream and I've been slathering the area with lotion. Hopefully, that will take care of it. Otherwise, the doctor said he would get me some cream that is used for severe burn victims. He did tell me it would probably get worse before we're done.

I go in for my herceptin treatment tomorrow. I will so glad to have that finished in December. It's been such a long journey... Today, I just want it all to be over with. I want my boobs back, my hair back, and a body that doesn't feel like it's 80 years old. I have been poked and prodded, stuck, pinched, and today they drew on me with a Sharpie. I'm sick of it all. Will I ever see "normal" again?

Cancer is stupid! Grrr, ya think I have a bad attitude today?

Radiation

Is it really mid August already? We have packed so much into our days... mostly outdoor stuff like the beach. We went tubing down the river last week with friends. We lazily drifted down the river for a few hours. It was a beautiful day!

I started radiation two Tuesdays ago. After the set up, it's been pretty simple.

I go in each day. I sit in the waiting room for about a minute before they call me back. I walk into the room and sign in and then I take off my shirt and necklace. I lay down on a table/board/hard thing that hurts my back. I turn my head to the left and up and I reach over my head with my arms to grab this handle. They align my tatoos with certain points.There are red lasers and and a round disk attached to an arm that rotates over my body and makes beeping noises. Looks like a small flying saucer. It's over in a few minutes and I am out the door until the next day. Then, I do it all over again.

Here's a picture of the new radiation machine that they put this year. This is the room I go to five days a week. I will be finished mid September after 31 treatments.

The doctor and nurses have been giving me heck about my tan. I'm suppose to be careful in my right breast area (or lack of breast area) with the sun. Darn, I guess I will stop going to the nude beach. I just refuse to stay out of the sun, though. Very little summer is left and I will enjoy every moment I can!

Dan and I enjoyed a day in Duluth and up the north shore while ALL 4 CHILDREN WERE AT CAMP. Yes, you read that right. The kids went to camp the same week. The little ones for 3 nights and Shelby for 5 nights. Anyway, we ate at a great restaurant and cruised along the shore of Lake Superior. We also enjoyed a bit of peace and quiet. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't want it that way for very long but it was nice for a few days! :)

Otherwise, I have been enjoying life. We hope to take the kiddos camping in the next week or two for the weekend. We are looking forward to our new school year. We all are anticipating a time without "treatments and sickness". It's coming soon! Yay!

One thing I ask of the Lord, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and to seek him in his temple. Psalm 27:4

Sweet Surprise

I was doing my grocery shopping on Saturday when I get a call and I didn't recognize the number but I answered it anyway. It was our local bike shop. The man asks me if my name is Colleen and I reply, "Yes". He tells me that they have a bike for me at the shop. I pause for a moment, searching for the right words, "Are you sure you have the right person? I didn't drop a bike off for repairs." He tell me that he has a bike for Colleen and this was the number given. I say thanks and that I will be over there right away. I'm curious and shaky with excitement as I make my way to the bike shop.

Let me go back by saying that I have been wanting a cruiser style bike so that I can work on getting my strength back after 7 months of chemo. I had talked to a friend about purchasing one from her and then it fell through because the bike had been given to someone else. I knew that somehow I would get a bike and thought I would look at some garage sales.


I walk into the bike shop and this bike is setting here in the show room with my name on it. The card said,
Colleen! Congratulations...the Lord has worked miracles in you! Enjoy the freedom! "Count it all joy my brothers..." James 1:2-4




Mine is not white but pink. Isn't it seriously cool? And isn't it even more cool that God provided exactly what I needed and even more than I could imagine!

The man who set the bike up for me said that his mom and grandmother had had breast cancer. He told me that doing surprises like this was his favorite part of the job.

Dan and I went for a spin last evening. It rides like a dream! I felt like a kid again and I got a great workout in the process.

So, if you see a bald chick on a pink cruiser, it's probably me. :) Honk and wave, k! Mmmm, on second thought, just wave.

A BIG thank you to my anonymous gift giver(s). Your love for Him and me is amazing!

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. 1 Corinthians 13:13